April 2, 2009 at 4:53 pm
... My dad taught at a university and was given by someone (I never knew who) a 4-foot section of a four-by-four with one end shaped into the handle of a baseball bat. He kept it posted on the wall of his office as a joke.
Now, how does one turn a 4x4 into a baseball bat? Apart from the fact that a 4-foot bat is a bit on the dangerous side. Batter might well kill the umpire and knock the catcher out. Good thing dad kept it on the wall :crazy:
April 2, 2009 at 4:55 pm
I'm sticking to my rule... if, especially after repeated attempts, the poster to continues to post forever changing data examples and still refuses to even try to post the data in a readily consumable format, then the poster isn't willing to try... and like the "etiquette" article says, I just move on.
If all the heavy hitters started doing that, especially after how rude some of these ayedee-ten-tee's have gotten, then they'd finally get the point.
--Jeff Moden
April 2, 2009 at 5:18 pm
Kit, in my house we had a "Board of Education" which was applied to "The Seat of Learning."
My brothers and I were well-behaved.
Jeff, I have a post coming later on the "Just walk away." topic. Glad to hear you are going to write a book. How much do all you authors on here charge for autographed copies?
Jan, can you tell me if my Multi Column Sort explanation makes sense to you?
__________________________________________________
Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain. -- Friedrich Schiller
Stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down. -- Stephen Stills
April 2, 2009 at 6:45 pm
GSquared (4/2/2009)
This is the kind that gives me hope:http://qa.sqlservercentral.com/Forums/Topic688912-149-1.aspx
This is the kind that drives me to The Thread:
http://qa.sqlservercentral.com/Forums/Topic688302-338-1.aspx
I keep going on the second type because of the first type.
My goodness!!!! Is this (your second link) an example of what happens to common sense and courtesy under the perceived anonymity of the internet? "Don't feel bad if you don't get it." says the poster in response to the very first attempt to help. Who doesn't "get it" here? Does this person behave this way in "real life"? Does he/she not realize that this is still "real life" with real people?
I'm afraid this "multi-column sort" thread has humbled me tremendously. I don't know if I would ever have the patience to keep trying to help someone so defensive about his/her own ability and knowledge that he/she throws out condescending insults so soon, even while acknowledging that they are by saying "I'm not making judgements or trying to insult anyone's intelligence...".
Here's one tip I picked up years ago: If you find yourself about to say "I don't mean to (whatever)", then just shut up because yes, you were about to (whatever).
April 2, 2009 at 7:42 pm
I'm waiting for Bob to ask him what 1 + 1 is.
It's not always 2.
Or you're on an electric train, heading from Minneapolis to Chicago at 50 mph.
There is a strong wind coming from the north at 30 mph.
Which direction does the smoke blow?
It would be interesting to understand what the data represents, and the business reason for this particular order.
Scalability is a concern. He probably has far more columns and rows than the sample data.
Reminds me of the software vendors and their demos. Where show me what you can do with my data tells the real story.
Great learning experience for me looking through some of the solutions.
So at least someone is learning something, and your time isn't a total waste.
Greg E
April 2, 2009 at 8:00 pm
So three guys check into a fancy hotel together wanting to share a single room. The night clerk tells them the room is $300 for the night. They each pull out $100 and give it to the clerk. He gives them a key and they go up to the room.
Then the night manager walks in and tells the clerk that the room should have only cost $250 for the night. He sends the night clerk up to the room with five tens to give back to the room occupants.
On the way up to the room, the night clerk thinks... "There is no way these guys can split these five bills evenly, so I'll just give them back $10 apiece and keep $20 for a tip." Woe and shame, he proceeds to do just that.
Now the question is this: If each of the men paid only 90 bucks (100-10) and 3*90 = 270, and the bellboy kept 20 for a tip, that's only 290 out of the original 300 dollars.
What happened to the other 10?
__________________________________________________
Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain. -- Friedrich Schiller
Stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down. -- Stephen Stills
April 2, 2009 at 8:35 pm
[font="Verdana"]Thanks for that Bob. Now I have to clean up the mess of my brain exploding all over my monitors![/font]
April 2, 2009 at 8:37 pm
I'm sure you'll work it out, mate. 😛
__________________________________________________
Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain. -- Friedrich Schiller
Stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down. -- Stephen Stills
April 2, 2009 at 8:49 pm
Bothered me for a bit as well. Unfortunately, you can't ADD the 20 to the 270, you have to subtract it. There is no missing 10 dollars.
April 2, 2009 at 8:52 pm
Lynn is correct. Two points for the little green Master. :hehe:
__________________________________________________
Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain. -- Friedrich Schiller
Stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down. -- Stephen Stills
April 2, 2009 at 9:30 pm
ARRRRGGG! Some people (who will not be named or linked to) SHOULD NOT be allowed near or to work with computers! I'm going back out into the desert for awhile, anyone care to join me??
April 2, 2009 at 10:18 pm
Bob Hovious (4/2/2009)
So three guys check into a fancy hotel together wanting to share a single room. The night clerk tells them the room is $300 for the night. They each pull out $100 and give it to the clerk. He gives them a key and they go up to the room.Then the night manager walks in and tells the clerk that the room should have only cost $250 for the night. He sends the night clerk up to the room with five tens to give back to the room occupants.
On the way up to the room, the night clerk thinks... "There is no way these guys can split these five bills evenly, so I'll just give them back $10 apiece and keep $20 for a tip." Woe and shame, he proceeds to do just that.
Now the question is this: If each of the men paid only 90 bucks (100-10) and 3*90 = 270, and the bellboy kept 20 for a tip, that's only 290 out of the original 300 dollars.
What happened to the other 10?
Heh... that's how they crash Martian landers... wrong math. Looks good, but it's the wrong math.
--Jeff Moden
April 2, 2009 at 10:28 pm
Jeff Moden (4/2/2009)
Bob Hovious (4/2/2009)
So three guys check into a fancy hotel together wanting to share a single room. The night clerk tells them the room is $300 for the night. They each pull out $100 and give it to the clerk. He gives them a key and they go up to the room.Then the night manager walks in and tells the clerk that the room should have only cost $250 for the night. He sends the night clerk up to the room with five tens to give back to the room occupants.
On the way up to the room, the night clerk thinks... "There is no way these guys can split these five bills evenly, so I'll just give them back $10 apiece and keep $20 for a tip." Woe and shame, he proceeds to do just that.
Now the question is this: If each of the men paid only 90 bucks (100-10) and 3*90 = 270, and the bellboy kept 20 for a tip, that's only 290 out of the original 300 dollars.
What happened to the other 10?
Heh... that's how they crash Martian landers... wrong math. Looks good, but it's the wrong math.
Actually, the math was correct, they used wrong "standard" english vs metric. I just don't remember which.
April 2, 2009 at 10:29 pm
Bob Hovious (4/2/2009)
Kit, in my house we had a "Board of Education" which was applied to "The Seat of Learning."My brothers and I were well-behaved.
Jeff, I have a post coming later on the "Just walk away." topic. Glad to hear you are going to write a book. How much do all you authors on here charge for autographed copies?
Jan, can you tell me if my Multi Column Sort explanation makes sense to you?
Heh... yeah, I finally got talked into it. Tony Davis made it just too darned easy to say "No" anymore. I'm truly honored by all the well wishes I've been getting from good folks like yourself. Thanks, Bob. And no charge for the autograph. 😛 Wish I could say the same for the book... but that's up to Tony... :hehe:
--Jeff Moden
April 2, 2009 at 10:40 pm
Greg Edwards (4/2/2009)
I'm waiting for Bob to ask him what 1 + 1 is.It's not always 2.
Reminds me of a saying that's actually a bit of a riddle...
[font="Arial Black"]There are 10 types of people in the world...
Those that understand Binary and those that don't.[/font]
The other one that seems to apply to the way some folks post is (pardon the writer's license)...
[font="Courier New"] SELECT p.Courtesy
FROM Forum.arrogant.Posters p
WHERE p.Clue > 0
OR Attitude = 'Proper'
(0 row(s) affected)[/font]
Jeez... they still haven't fixed the drivers for this forum... it still deletes leading and duplicate spaces... I almost wish they'd just put it back the way it was. The posters do a bad enough job, already... they don't need the computer to help them make their code look any worse.
--Jeff Moden
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