May 7, 2010 at 7:24 am
That's an FN great story! 😀
May 7, 2010 at 7:26 am
Heh... my colorful name for certain types of code is likely obvious at this point in history...
[font="Arial Black"]RBAR[/font]
--Jeff Moden
May 7, 2010 at 7:26 am
One of my favorites - It compiles beautifully, so how can the answer be wrong???
May 7, 2010 at 7:37 am
Rob_code - code that took about a zillion years to write and as completed "almost" meets the original requirements.
May 7, 2010 at 7:45 am
band-aid fixes. Basically our code has broken due to poor design but instead of actually fixing it through architecture changes, we like to put band-aids on it and send it back to work.
May 7, 2010 at 7:52 am
Oldware - Using a release from 10 years ago because no one wants to pay for the upgrade, and, "hey, it still works". This usually bites you hard when you find the app won't run on new hardware, and there aren't any spares around for the hardware you have. And, it's a business critical package. And, it won't run on the new release of the OS.
May 7, 2010 at 7:54 am
The following are used in other situations, but in the context of software development have taken on the given meanings for me.
"quick and dirty" - software that is thrown together quickly and intended to be a temporary solution but that often ends up sticking around for some time
"dog and pony show" - a demonstration of software, usually to higher management or the intended user, that may be complete, but is often still under development
There is also "legacy" software.
Eddie
May 7, 2010 at 8:02 am
Blue Peter code - for something chucked together then re-used. Named from the UK childrens' tv program Blue Peter running since I was a child in the early sixties, where they show you how to make something (usually from washing up liquid bottles, wire coat hangers, sticky tape and sticky back plastic) then produce a finished one with the catchphrase "Here's one I made earlier".
When choosing a business system we likened them all to cars. One was a kit car with so much optional add on code, another was a Russian Zil - one size and colour only - another was a sports car - great in one way but no good for all purposes. We were trying to find an MPV.
May 7, 2010 at 8:09 am
Asymptotic Featured
Most software written at my company ends up being very asymptote like, I can see the end - but I am never allowed to reach it...
Another is schizophrenic processing...
Code that must support two diametrically opposed and logically opposite business rules inside one button.
May 7, 2010 at 8:12 am
There are three main component categories for a system:
"Hardware" - physical devices. How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None. That's a hardware problem.
"Software" - easy to dismiss but hard to write.
"Squishware" - the processing that takes place in the head of the user. Between the ears and behind the eyes. "Squish" is what we would like to do to some of them.
ATBCharles Kincaid
May 7, 2010 at 8:26 am
Code that is basically functional, something good enough for internal users, but not good enough for release to the public, is "not ready for prime time".
"Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of the wise. Instead, seek what they sought." - Matsuo Basho
May 7, 2010 at 8:32 am
Let's not leave out "User hostile". The kind of system that makes it easy to picture an end user smashing their computer with a 4# sledge hammer. 😀
_______________________________________________________________
Need help? Help us help you.
Read the article at http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Best+Practices/61537/ for best practices on asking questions.
Need to split a string? Try Jeff Modens splitter http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Tally+Table/72993/.
Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 1 – Converting Rows to Columns - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/T-SQL/63681/
Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 2 - Dynamic Cross Tabs - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Crosstab/65048/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 1) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69953/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 2) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69954/
May 7, 2010 at 8:36 am
I was asked if I was going to write my life story. No. But I thought about writing the amusing stories that have happened over the years. The working title was "My Life In Software". I went through several others and finally settled on one.
"USER is a four letter word!"
ATBCharles Kincaid
May 7, 2010 at 9:18 am
Spaghetti Code has already been mentioned. And it did/does exist (read legacy). An anecdote:
Many years ago I was hired at a firm to support the new branch office automation platform that was going to revolutionize the company and automate the full process of ordering, delivering and reporting on the services provided.
I took a hard copy of the dump of the code home for the weekend. (No thumb drives back then!) I spent the weekend with the paper spread out on the dining room table, then the kitchen table, then the coffe table. I was attempting to connect processes using colored pens then my wifes full set of art drawing pencils.
The next Monday I walked into the hiring managers office (VP Electronic Data Processing) with my colorful handy work and casually mentioned that I would not support this software. I showed him my attempts to trace process (yes many 'GOTO's). The coder resposible was called into the office. The answer to the question, 'Is there some reason that this needs to written in such a convoluted manner was; "Job security." Needless to say that system was never deployed.
Viewing 15 posts - 31 through 45 (of 98 total)
You must be logged in to reply to this topic. Login to reply