Are the posted questions getting worse?
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Jeff Moden (3/26/2009)
Grant Fritchey (3/26/2009)
Bob Hovious (3/26/2009)
CONGRATULATIONS, ROY !!!!!YOU are Mr. 3000.
In honor of this momentous occasion, you get to buy beers for the whole gang, and a Diet Dr. Pepper for Lynn. 😀
And some scotch. Never forget the scotch.
Dang... I knew I liked you for some good reason, Grant... :-P:hehe:
Three different single malts, some J&B and this funky Japanese stuff that a friend got me for my birthday, all downstairs, quietly whispering my name.
----------------------------------------------------The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood... Theodore RooseveltThe Scary DBAAuthor of: SQL Server 2017 Query Performance Tuning, 5th Edition and SQL Server Execution Plans, 3rd EditionProduct Evangelist for Red Gate Software
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Grant Fritchey (3/26/2009)
Three different single malts, some J&B and this funky Japanese stuff that a friend got me for my birthday, all downstairs, quietly whispering my name.I didn't make it to Lil' Rhody last summer because of the new job, but I'm goin' out there THIS summer to see my parents. I'm just gonna have to look you up, Grant. 😉 If a gray bearded guy shows up on your porch, don't shoot him... it's probably me. :hehe:
--Jeff Moden
RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.
"Change is inevitable... change for the better is not".
Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally)
Intro to Tally Tables and Functions -
Lynn Pettis (3/26/2009)
You must answer with no foul or abusive language.BWAA-HAAA!!! ... who the hell made THAT rule? This IS the thread. 😉
--Jeff Moden
RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.
"Change is inevitable... change for the better is not".
Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally)
Intro to Tally Tables and Functions -
Jeff Moden (3/26/2009)
BWAA-HAAA!!! ... who the hell made THAT rule? This IS the thread. 😉Umm, hmmm (throat clearing)
Follow me on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/way0utwest
Forum Etiquette: How to post data/code on a forum to get the best help
My Blog: www.voiceofthedba.com -
Aw, Jeff... don't hurt Lynn's delicate little green ears. 😛
Else, be shown the red card you might, yes.....
__________________________________________________
Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain. -- Friedrich Schiller
Stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down. -- Stephen Stills -
GilaMonster (3/26/2009)
AAaaahhhhh!!!!!!!Three days of major internet connectivity issues and every tech I speak to wants me to restart the machine and reset the modem.
Then, tonight, the crowning glory.
The error is "The remote computer did not respond. PPP control link terminated"
The tech's immediate response: "The modem software is corrupt. You need to reinstall it"
I pointed out to him that the software does not uninstall properly (leaves pieces of drivers behind) and the only way to reinstall the software is to reinstall the OS.
He then had me doing some (completely useless) register edits.
He then reset my password.
An hour later.....
He goes and consults his techs who find out that there's a bunch of orphaned sessions on the tower that I'm trying to use.
Is there such a thing as competent technical support these days?
And this morning, no connection again!
#$%^%#%$&^%$@#%&^*()*&^^$#$%^&*()(*&^%!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gail Shaw
Microsoft Certified Master: SQL Server, MVP, M.Sc (Comp Sci)
SQL In The Wild: Discussions on DB performance with occasional diversions into recoverabilityWe walk in the dark places no others will enter
We stand on the bridge and no one may pass -
Jeff Moden (3/26/2009)
Lynn Pettis (3/26/2009)
You must answer with no foul or abusive language.BWAA-HAAA!!! ... who the hell made THAT rule? This IS the thread. 😉
Well, I think Steve answered that. What you tell me in a PM stays private, but this is a public forum. I already know your feelings about Celko, all you have to do is tell me where the other dude fits, and I'll know pretty much how you feel about him.
I'll be honest, I think Celko is abrasive and condecending in is approach to dealing with MS SQL and using its "non ansi" capabilities. I happen to agre with using the SQL engine to its fullest. Why give up power just to keep things "standard" in case you change later?
The other dude, however, I think just needs an education. Obviously he wasn't trained properly and he has a definate attitude of superiority. I do think, however, he is slowly learning (again at the speed of a glacier) that there is more to SQL Server that he really needs to learn. He just hasn't had the "AH HAH" moment as Bob mentioned. Hit a man with a bat enough and hopefully he is going to learn that it hurts. We just have to be the one with the bats, and those bats are experience and knowledge of better ways of doing things.
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GilaMonster (3/26/2009)
GilaMonster (3/26/2009)
AAaaahhhhh!!!!!!!Three days of major internet connectivity issues and every tech I speak to wants me to restart the machine and reset the modem.
Then, tonight, the crowning glory.
The error is "The remote computer did not respond. PPP control link terminated"
The tech's immediate response: "The modem software is corrupt. You need to reinstall it"
I pointed out to him that the software does not uninstall properly (leaves pieces of drivers behind) and the only way to reinstall the software is to reinstall the OS.
He then had me doing some (completely useless) register edits.
He then reset my password.
An hour later.....
He goes and consults his techs who find out that there's a bunch of orphaned sessions on the tower that I'm trying to use.
Is there such a thing as competent technical support these days?
And this morning, no connection again!
#$%^%#%$&^%$@#%&^*()*&^^$#$%^&*()(*&^%!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Either that's a polite representation of "foul and abusive language" or the error correction on Gail's connection is really bad! 🙂
Derek
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Lynn Pettis (3/26/2009)
I'm actually thinking that the company doesn't have a dedicated DBA for the SQL Server systems and that the Developers are also doing the DBA work. That means nobody really knows any better, from top to bottom. Sounds like a challenge for a performance consultant to me.This is the exact scenario where I work (and the databases do seem to perform adequately, funnily enough! Probably because they're all pretty small and the server's spec is decent)
In my case, it's a challenge for me - we have a new boss who is hopefully going to force us to sort this mess out, and I've actually gone and volunteered for it!
It's been really interesting so far, and I'm dreading having some .NET development work thrown at me (that's my official job reponsibility) because Sql Server work >>>>>>>> .NET work 😀
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Funny Friday for The Thread!!
Smile everyone
Follow me on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/way0utwest
Forum Etiquette: How to post data/code on a forum to get the best help
My Blog: www.voiceofthedba.com -
:-D:-D:-D:-D:-D:-D
Activity on the Thread seems to have diminished. Should I be worried? Is THE THREAD executing its plan to take over the world and that's why no new posts?
Or has everyone just taken the afternoon off and is busy quaffing the beverages listed above to get an early start on the weekend?
-- Kit
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It's possible that after Roy mentioned free drinks yesterday, there was a flurry of activity, and then the hangover took over.
Or maybe they're tossing sandbags up in Fargo ND.
Greg E
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Or more likely those out near Denver are snowed in someplace. I'm pretty sure I remember Steve talking about putting in a generator in one of the Energy updates, and I've seen him posting today so I know he's doing OK. Here's hoping Lynn and the others out that direction weather the storm successfully as well. And to those up in ND keep filling those sandbags!
Be interesting to hear from anyone what their disaster recovery plans were and how they fared in the case of a blizzard or flood. Future article perhaps?
-Luke.
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I was actually trying to increase my productivity by limiting my threadioactivity, Kit.
But it's quite possible that spring fever is in the air for those of us down south.
__________________________________________________
Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain. -- Friedrich Schiller
Stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down. -- Stephen Stills -
Yeah, could be. From what I saw last night, that blizzard was a nasty one. My sympathies to the people up in ND with their flooding. Not only do they have flooding... but it's icy flooding. brrrrrrrr.
Of course, I could mention that we're having a nice day with upper 70s temperatures in Tampa... but give it a couple of months and we'll be in hurricane season (starts June 1). While the rain will be nice if any hurricanes drop by (we're in a three year drought)... I can do without the winds over 72 miles per hour. Having my apartment smashed by the wind isn't on my list of fun things to have happen. And my apartment managers don't have a routine to secure the buildings if a hurricane passes through. Any securing of windows and stuff will have to be done by me. Oh joy.
-- Kit
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